I’m feeling pretty low down this evening. I don’t think I’d recognize a positive thought even if by some miracle I had one. Hopelessness is not a good feeling.
IT’S NANOWRIMO TIME!…YAY!
I just decided for sure over the last couple of days to participate in NaNoWriMo again this year. This is my 5th year–I can’t believe it’s been that long. I’ll be flying by the seat of my pants this year because I just thought of my book title today and I don’t really have a plot to speak of yet. Oh well, that will be the challenge of it, I suppose. My book is titled Duplicity Redux and the story will be centered on a college campus. My main character will be a man–it should be interesting to try to inhabit the male psyche. I’m not sure what genre the book will be–mainstream or literary I suppose. I’ll know more about it as I begin writing it (I hope!)
This is going to be an extremely busy month for me at work so I’ll just have to pray that I have the time, strength, energy, and will to devote myself to this book like I want to. To any fellow NaNoWriMo’er’s out there who may read this, good luck, happy writing, and see you at the finish line!
Here is my book jacket. I like to draw my own illustrations, but I didn’t have the time or inspiration this year, so below is what I came up with. I think maybe the arrow should have been pointing the other way?
My NaNoWriMo Novel 2010--Duplicity Redux
THE FUTURE FASHION QUEEN? LOL
I don’t usually look at fashion magazines and the like, but this week I decided to buy one to read/look at while I was walking on the treadmill. I can’t believe how skinny everyone in Vogue is–everytime I want to eat, I’m going to look at Vogue and that will probably take my appetite away. I’m pretty sure all of those models are too skinny, but golly gee, I’d sure like to be that skinny just once! It makes me want to go out and buy some new shoes or something and I’m not even a shoe person.
LOSING WEIGHT, SELF-HYPNOSIS, AND TRAVEL! :)
It’s been a long time since I posted here. Finally, I have something that I’m interested in talking about! I gained a lot of weight over the past year and a half (thirty pounds!), and I’ve just recently gotten up the gumption to do something to address it. I’ve fallen in love with a dance exercise class called Zumba; it’s Latin-based dance movements with a little hip-hop thrown in–loads of fun! Walking a couple of times a week, light handweights, and yoga when I can fit it in round out my exercise program to four or five days a week–not too bad. The pounds and inches are coming off very slowly, but I am seeing a little success. I’ve dropped one size and have two to three sizes left to go. The largest impediment that I have is my tendency to eat impulsively when I’m not even really hungry–I guess it’s emotional eating. I think that’s the biggest reason that I’ve only lost seven pounds in about six weeks.
So I’ve come up with a plan that I hope will address it. Thirteen years ago, I stopped smoking after having smoked two packs a day for twenty-three years. I used several strategies to help me and one of them was self-hypnosis. I made a relaxation/hynosis tape about all of the reasons I wanted to quit smoking and how I was strong enough to do it. I used the tape once or twice a day and I think it really made a difference. And it can make a difference with my weight, too, I believe. I made a tape today where I talk about eating right and how I’m strong enough to do whatever I want to do, etc. Looking forward to seeing how using this tape a couple of times a day speeds up my weight loss, because…
I want to be in shape for my trip in December to Hawaii!!! I’ve never flown before, so that will be an adventure in itself. I’ll be staying a week with five other people–I’m a little nervous about flying such a long ways my first time, but looking forward to the trip very much. Gotta go now–must practice my hula skills, lol.
ON BEING NUMB
I haven’t posted anything in this blog in awhile, mostly because I haven’t had anything to say. Today I do.
I was pretty happy earlier this week, in a superficial sort of way, because I finished my portfolio for NB teacher certification and mailed it off. One half of the grueling process is over–Yay!
But some of my excitement over that is muted today because of some bad news I’ve received.
Day before yesterday, my best friend’s fifteen year old dog died. It’s always devasting to lose an animal if you’re an animal lover, but I know this loss is especially painful for her because this dog belonged to her and her husband when they were still married. She is in my thoughts a lot today.
Yesterday, another friend’s mother died. My heart aches for her; I know from personal experience the long and difficult journey that she has ahead of her learning to cope with this.
Because of these sad circumstances, I’m reflecting a lot today on the recent loss of my cat, Mitty, and also the loss of my mother thirteen years ago. But I’m not going to talk about it a lot today–sometimes it’s easier just to shut it out and be numb.
NANOWRIMO, LESSONS, AND CHALLENGES
I don’t have a lot to say today. My Nanowrimo novel is coming along slowly–I’m up to 23,000 words–I should have about 35,000, though. I may or may not make the 50,000 word count–we’ll see. It really depends on how motivated I feel over Thanksgiving.
Here’s a recently-learned lesson: Don’t believe what people say; believe what they do. I’ve learned it before, but as I am very naive and trusting, I have to relearn it every now and then. But it’s hard every single time.
On a more positive note, a challenge and chance to be creative looms before me. I’ll soon be seeking an advanced teaching credential that will require an extensive written portfolio, videotaped lessons, and timed essay responses at the end of it all. The portfolio should be doable and the videotape will make me nervous but I can handle it. What has me in a wad is the timed essay responses. I can make pretty decent essay responses, but I don’t do well with timed anything! It’s almost essential for me to have time to mull over things for awhile before I respond to them. Oh well, like I said, it’s a challenge and chance to be creative. 
